


seedlings

by isometric



Category: No Guns Life (Anime)
Genre: Gen, and slight spoilery victor mention?, for the purposes of this fic juuzou's in his mid-30s and tetsurou's 12, no one calls tetsurou by name so this fic only does so once :/, slight spoiler for vol 2 extra
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-13
Updated: 2020-05-13
Packaged: 2021-03-02 01:20:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 608
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23656762
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/isometric/pseuds/isometric
Summary: Juuzou looked at the kid and wondered.
Relationships: Arahabaki Tetsurou & Inui Juuzou
Kudos: 16





	seedlings

The thing about the kid was that he had those big, trusting eyes.

Juuzou knew despair and desperation intimately. The way they threaded into someone’s voice, into their eyes—the way they’d choke up a person overwhelmed with emotion. He saw it too many times, in his clients, crying families come for revenge, for a way out; the homeless he passed on the streets; even Scarlett before she understood she could rely on on him. Some nights he still dreamed of Auto Cass as she stood over him, looking at the remains of her dead lover and asking to pull his trigger, even as she begged him to pull the trigger.

The empty shell the kid used to escape shouldn’t have been able to emote vocally, but it did. Juuzou heard the pain in that staticky voice, grief borne from a life of suffering, and later on, as the kid took over a living Extend, he heard the manic hope of a boy at his wits’ end. He knew this kid; he knew that desperation.

And yet, despite all the things the kid had endured, none of that horror showed in his eyes. He looked at the world with wonder and curiosity, looked at strangers and friends alike without a hint of wariness—almost like he hadn’t learnt his lesson under Behrüren at all. Like nothing could break the hope living inside him.

And when he turned those eyes to Juuzou—

It made Juuzou want to turn the kid away. To tell him to guard his life better, that not everyone who helped out did so out of the good in their heart. That Mary and Christina were the exceptions, not the rule; that he himself was no exception, intending to collect someday, one way or another. He imagined arguing with the kid, in the rare moments he could convince himself that he’d be able to stomach breaking the kid’s heart: _look at what happened to Ende and Anna_ , he would say, _look what trust brings you_.

 _Someone loving you doesn’t mean they’re good for you_ , he couldn’t bring himself to say, thinking of Victor. Likewise, loving someone wasn’t the same thing as being good for them. So instead, he’d say in his head, _trust isn’t always warranted_. And yet, even that felt like a betrayal of sorts, never mind that he hadn't actually said a thing.

The kid made him change. He’d been changing all this time, as each person he’d met and gotten to know left their influence on him, but the kid was different. He wasn’t just getting under Juuzou’s skin, with childish beliefs and nightmares and the need for scoldings and regular meals. There was something like care and concern for the kid too, he hated to admit, because tenderness rarely survived in this shitty world.

The worst part was, the kid made him want to change. Want to look forward to what could be, without Behrüren’s influence. Every time he looked at those large, hopeful eyes, shining with whatever rosy tint the kid saw the world through, it made him wonder. Could things be better? Could he give those he cared for something better? Could he really help bring to life that world Victor envisioned?

Then Tetsurou would blink, cat-like, and Juuzou would snap back to himself. He’d resist the urge to ruffle the kid’s hair, unsure of the boundaries between them, but he’d nudge the kid back to whatever chores Mary had assigned them both. And once the kid returned to sewing, or potato-peeling, or practicing his letters, Juuzou would take a drag of his cigarette, and let his mind wander again.

**Author's Note:**

> ~~casually ignoring the author's lamentable treatment of female characters~~
> 
> Just an excuse to gush over Tetsurou's doe eyes. My heart exploded at the end of ep11 when Juuzou checked in on the kid.
> 
> That said, I don't think he'd adopt Tetsurou, even informally, however much I wish him to.


End file.
